Love. It can be fulfilling and frustrating at the same time. Something you wish you had never encountered and yet can't wait till it strikes again. Setting aside all the cliches about the melodrama love entails, it is quite evident that it does not follow the dictum - once bitten twice shy.
It is quite possible for a person to hesitate to confess to the quickening of the pulse and the general debilitation of the central nervous system at the mere sight of another after faltering at a similar endeavour earlier. But, that does not imply the absence of all and any falling victim to the vicissitudes of the villainy of the vain heart, which causes pain not just to itself but to the gullible host as well.
Love is the phenomenon that thrives in adversity. This fact is well documented. You give it war, inter-religion rivalry, societal mores and it will find a way to thwart the odds. But at an individual's level, it shows this fickle nature by springing its cupid head when you least expect it. It mocks at our plans and our 'understanding' of the universe. It can't be explained, predicted, controlled or extinguished. It is the sledgehammer to the nutty idea that is determinism.
The scientist or rationalist still seeks to comprehend its ways and many visages, through experiments in psychology or capturing the causative genes or detecting electrical impulses in the brain. The romantics however try to be one with it by picking up the pen, brush or guitar.
But, I just want to be a test subject to the experiment that is love. I lie restlessly in wait for the emotional roller coaster that it promises, testing my capacity as a rational being trying to ascertain its nature, to be sure of its ways and then be debunked not long after, to ascend the insurmountable, to grasp the unfathomable, to experience what civilization is no closer to understanding - much less control - since its very conception.
I am in love with love itself. But alas, it seldom comes to those who seek it.